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So many of us see overcoming mental illness or achieve if any goal as a battle to be won. We see it as a fight. We muster the troops and go to war.
What we don’t realise is we could be doing more harm than good. That in fighting against mental illness we are only actually fighting against ourselves.
I have learnt the hard way that it is not about silencing the voices in my head. It is not about forcing myself to feel a certain way. It is about accepting myself warts and all. It is about appreciating my body and what it try’s to do for me, even when it does get things a little wrong. Those voices are there to protect me. The feelings are there to help me learn something, or appreciate something or be aware of something.
So how can we win the greatest fight of our lives without fighting.
Accept where you are today
That might be a good place, it might be bad. Wherever you are in this exact moment you can choose where you want to go next. And where you are now is just where you need to be.
Resistance in futile!
Don’t resist what you need to feel. Open yourself up to it. This sometimes need careful support from a professional. I have found two reasons this is important.
- What we resist persists. If you try tot hold back the pain it somehow can get stronger.
- Learning to feel all the emotions we as humans are gifted to experience is an essential part of life.
Don’t beat yourself up.
We are all less than we want to be at times. We all get it wrong at times. Don’t beat yourself up when you don’t achieve what you want to. Learn from it. Rest a little and come back stronger the next time.